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\n“(W)e\u2019re sometimes forced to free ourselves from the traps of these societal expectations of productivity and busyness.”<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n
Why do we push ourselves to the point of detrimental consequences such as fatigue or exhaustion, anxiety or stress, depression or isolation\u2026? Is it the expectation we feel to act a certain way coming from society, family and friends, work associates, or ourselves?<\/p>\n
We aren\u2019t born this way, but it becomes engrained in our psyche. And how many of us stop to question it? Often, it\u2019s an illness or traumatic life event that wakes us up to wondering why we\u2019re accepting a life of stress or exhaustion rather than serenity or fulfillment. In a sense, we\u2019re sometimes forced to free ourselves from the traps of these societal expectations of productivity and busyness.<\/p>\n
In my 20s I accepted the \u201cfact\u201d that adult life was going to be fairly cold and hard. My main goal was supposed to be making a living for myself. I was \u2018financially scared\u2019 into thinking that should be first and foremost. But a little voice inside of me asked, \u2018Where had the wonder gone?\u2019<\/p>\n
As I befriended that voice and she helped me hone a vision plus gain courage over the years, the tides began turning. There came a point when I knew I would have to do something radical \u2013 and somewhat socially unacceptable at my age \u2013 which was quit my job, move to Maine and work in a national park for a summer. What was going to happen afterward? I didn\u2019t know the details; I just knew it was going to be a fresh start based on MY terms and conditions.<\/p>\n
\u201cBurnout\u201d is also known as Compassion Fatigue for those who make a living helping others. Stephen Walker\u2019s advice is not to give more than 49%. \u201cKnow when and how much to let go,\u201d he says (Perhaps we could all benefit from hearing more from him on this).<\/p>\n
\u201cSelf Care is important as a remedy,\u201d he also says, \u201cbut often there\u2019s a control issue (believing you\u2019re supposed to give 100%, be in control at all times, and are responsible for it all). There\u2019s ego behind it too, tying you to these expectations, but it\u2019s also the work culture in America.\u201d<\/p>\n
Then there\u2019s the Retirement Mentality, when you work until you hit the wall, then have to collapse instead of relaxing. Stephen\u2019s advice: \u201cDon\u2019t take it to the limit because it\u2019s just not sustainable.\u201d<\/p>\n
Not all burnout is the same. We each have our own \u201cbrand\u201d of burnout depending on our lifestyle. Some of us feel overworked or overly stressed, while others feel underwhelmed or uninspired. Like depression and anxiety, they are two sides of the same coin. In fact, it is actually difficult for me to talk about burnout right now because what I am feeling is more like the former: Intermittent bouts of depression and anxiety. It feels more like a societal-lifestyle burnout in that I feel disconnected from the most basic joys of making a life rather than making a living.<\/p>\n
For instance, my awareness is extremely heightened about the \u201ccarbon footprint\u201d I am leaving behind. What matters most to me \u2013 aside from kindred family and friends \u2013 is recycling more and \u201cconsuming\u201d less, growing my own food and making my own herbs, saving the bees and other endangered species, investing locally and conscientiously, stopping to smell the rosemary each and every day\u2026 Basically, living closer to the land while caring deeply for it, not just taking from it. This way of life takes me back to the basics of life. And while it may seem \u201csurvivalist\u201d, it feels more along the lines of thriving to me. Even perhaps, thriving from the surviving. Because what do all those societal expectations mean or lead to, anyway? A distraction from our own empowerment? A distraction from the wonders of caring for our own needs? A false belief that a busy life is a truly fulfilling one?<\/p>\n
Again, my current burnout may look and feel quite different from yours. But the more you get to know it, the more you get to know yourself and what matters most. Thus, the more you can alter the details\/circumstances of your life based on your heart\/soul\/spirit\u2019s truest longings. A significant door may close behind you, but the views from that newly opened window may be mightily majestic.<\/p>\n
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Why do we push ourselves to the point of detrimental consequences such as fatigue or exhaustion, anxiety or stress, depression or isolation\u2026? Is it the expectation we feel to act a certain way coming from society, family and friends, work associates, or ourselves? We aren\u2019t born this way, but it becomes engrained in our psyche.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":2226,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"ppma_author":[16,10],"class_list":["post-2269","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-september-2017","et-has-post-format-content","et_post_format-et-post-format-standard"],"authors":[{"term_id":16,"user_id":2,"is_guest":0,"slug":"stephen-walker","display_name":"Stephen Bryant Walker, MFT","avatar_url":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/03\/StephenWalker-150x150.jpg","user_url":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/","last_name":"Walker","first_name":"Stephen","description":"Mr. Walker is a licensed psychotherapist and Buddhist teacher (Lama Yeshe Jinpa) who provides his clients with compassionate support and encourages them to bring mindfulness and kindness to their problems, issues and life goals."},{"term_id":10,"user_id":6,"is_guest":0,"slug":"melanie","display_name":"Melanie Noel Light, MS","avatar_url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/32a567fd9428239348dea0a207d33b1de89bee5944d67194eb6ada8df8022cd0?s=96&d=blank&r=g","user_url":"","last_name":"Noel Light","first_name":"Melanie","description":"Visionary Consultant and Writing & Awareness Coach, Editor of La Dolce Vita Online Magazine dreamlifedesigning@gmail.com (916) 425.4478\r\nwww.dreamlifedesigning.com Author: Portals to the Soul, the Psyche & a More Enchanted Life Co-Author: Something So Obvious"}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2269","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2269"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2269\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2334,"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2269\/revisions\/2334"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2226"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2269"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2269"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2269"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/middlewayhealth.com\/ladolcevita\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/ppma_author?post=2269"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}